ANGRY BIRDS
I often have close encounters with angry people, not people who are upset at something specific that actually affected their personal lives, but people who always keep their fits of anger chambered and ready to fire at whatever and whoever (whomever”), and the the whatever/whomever list is usually pretty long. I know I can be annoying at times in the right environment and around the right crowd, but we all have that, we all have a certain percentage of annoying in us that will inevitably reach someone or some group at some point. Angry people actively look for that in everyone, they want to find what it is that is wrong with you that makes you not be angry like them, and whatever that is, to them, is the reason why their lives is not the way they want it to be.
Angry people are people who live in constant fear of life, not the life they fantasize about in their heads, but just life as it is, because life just is, and that is the way it is for everyone. Angry and scared birds always look at life as something that is always happening to them, and somehow it it always someone else’s fault that life keeps happening to them.
I too went trough about 87.3% of my adult life carrying that same anger and fear, Im no better than anyone, but once I saw that anger and fear within me, I started to work on myself in order to not make those things drive my every decision. I can say that the past 20%, or probably much less, of my years, I’ve made it a point to avoid ager, to not engage with it, don’t agree with it, don’t let it affect me… but anger is very contagious, easy to catch from others, so the work never stops.
I still catch myself going down certain roads when Im engaging with angry people, so I try to catch myself, watch my thoughts, hold my words back, because when I loose track of all of it, there I am again .. angry and scared of things that either have nothing to do with me, or that I have absolutely no control of. Unfortunately it is a very common, almost normal human response to revert to anger in order to confront certain life scenarios, but I haven’t been able to recall one single time in my life where I acted or made decisions in an angry state, that either made my life easier, or that specific situation any better… things just get worse, and that is the crappy loop angry people spend their days going around…”I’m mad so I’m going to act on it… my actions made things worse so now I’m angrier, repeat step 1..” and on and on.
I make art out of love, as a reaction to things that feel positive to me in the moment. I would not be able to do this if the dominant force in my everyday life was anger and/or fear. I want to give positivity a sense of permanence, not the opposite.
NEW PAINT WORK
Gucci - 24 × 30. Oil on canvas
This week at a glance
Thanks for reading,
Andres